A Bunch of Gleeks

We know you’ve at least heard of our new favorite show (unless you live under a rock), but we hope you’ve become just as addicted to Glee as we are. It doesn’t get much better than a super talented cast, with great songs, and a fascinating storyline. If you’re one of the few people who haven’t given into the Glee phenomenon, than you’re missing out on the fabulous lines from Jane Lynch who plays Sue Sylvester.


Sue is the captain of the Cheerios, which is the cheerleading squad from William McKinley High School. She is pure evil and will do whatever it takes to win: Including sending some of her Cheerios as spies to join the Glee Club, their arch nemesis. In a nutshell, she’s the deliciously evil villain that we love to hate, and here are a few reasons why…

Our top 20 Sue quotes:

1. Some people like to film themselves getting physical with their partner. I happen to enjoy revisiting the impeccable form of my jazzercise routines

2. I will no longer be carrying around photo ID. Know why? People should know who I am.

3. Somewhere on the English countryside, in a stately manor, Madonna is weeping.

4. As Madonna once said, I'm tough, I'm ambitious and if that makes me a bitch, that's what I am. Pretty sure she stole that line from Sue Sylvester. No, really. I said it first.

5. You think this was hard? Try auditioning for Baywatch and being told they're going in another direction. That was hard.

6. I, for one, think intimacy has no place in a marriage. Walked in on my parents once and it was like seeing two walruses wrestling.

7. You're right, Will. I have been trying to destroy your club with a conviction I can only call "religious."

8. You're dealing with children. They need to be terrified. It's like mother's milk to them.

9. I'm going to ask you to smell your armpits. That's the smell of failure, and it's stinking up my office.

10. That was the most offensive thing I've seen in 20 years of teaching — and that includes an elementary school production of Hair.

11. Sue: Iron tablet? It keeps your strength up when you menstruate.

Will: I don't menstruate.

Sue: Neither do I.

12. Sometimes people ask me, "Sue, how come you're so sensitive to minorities?" Well, I'll tell you why. Because I know firsthand how hard it is to struggle as a minority in America today. I'm 1/16th Comanche Indian. In fact, I like minorities so much, I'm thinking of moving to California to become one.

13. Let me break this down for you, okay? I empower my Cheerios to be champions. Do they go onto college? I don't know, I don't care. Should they learn Spanish? Sure, if they wanna become dishwashers and gardeners. But if they want to be bankers and lawyers and captains of industry, the most important lesson they could possibly learn is how to do a round off.

14. Your resentment is delicious.

15. Sue: High school is a caste system. Kids fall into certain slots. Your jocks and your popular kids up in the penthouse. The invisibles and the kids playing live-action out in the forest: bottom floor.

Will: And... Where do the Glee kids lie?

Sue: Subbasement.

16. Shuester! Well played, sir. I underestimated you. Alright, here’s what happens now. I’m gonna head on down to my condo in Boca, brown up a bit, get myself into fighting shape - then I’m gonna return to this school even more hell-bent on your destruction. Get ready for the ride of your life. Will Shuester; you are about to board the Sue Sylvester express. Destination: HORROR!

17. I’m reasonably confident you will be adding revenge to the long list of things you’re no good at, right next to being married, running a high school glee club, and finding a hair style that doesn’t make you look like a lesbian. Love ya like a sister.

18. I empower my Cheerios to live in a state of constant fear by creating an environment of irrational, random terror.

19. I will go to the animal shelter and get you a kitty cat. I will let you fall in love with that kitty cat. And then on some dark cold night, I will steal away into your house and punch you in the face.

20. [Ramps] are what I call lazy-makers. They discourage able-bodied students from getting proper exercise by using the stairs.