Twinkies!

Pop Tart here with a confession. As my name implies, I have a serious sweet tooth. I never met a chocolate I didn't like.  I also love novelty items, which is why I was ecstatic when someone brought Twinkies into the office.   Double the excitement because I have never eaten a Twinkie in my life.  (Dun-dun-duuuuuunnnnnn!)

I am quite familiar with the Ding-Dong, Ho-Ho, Cupcake variety of Hostess, but Twinkies?  I just never had the opportunity.  I know, it's about as scandalous as Fruity Pebbles never watching Star Wars. 

27 years on this planet, living in America and I have never tried this confection. But no more! Behold the mighty and majestic Hostess Twinkie that I am about to devour!

Okay, I admit, this is not the actual Twinkie I am about to devour, this is the nicey nice super imposed stock photo from Hostess.  Trust me, it looks a heck of a lot better than the one I am actually about to eat.

So, I am going to play food critic and give you a play by play of my voyage into this new and strange world of over processed pre-packaged post apocalyptic surviving pastries.

Choosing the Twinkie:  Timid, I approach the yellow brick road arrangement of Twinkies.  I size them up and pick the biggest, non-smooshed and crispy looking one of the bunch.

So many Twinkies, so little time.  And yes, these are the actual Twinkies I had to choose from.

The packaging:  I have to say, I am a sucker for cute packaging.  My Twinkie experience would have been 10x better had the packaging been more desirable.  But on the plus side, I had no difficulties whatsoever in opening up the wrapper.

The First Bite:  Very happy to report that the delectable cream filling is the same as used in the afore mentioned Hostess snacks I am familiar with.  I am now filled with childhood glee.  Snapped back to reality as my mind has begun to process the third chew. Decide that Twinkie is nothing more than sponge cake with cream filling.  Not too bad.  Tastes kind of good.  Maybe I'll buy some and add strawberries?  Hold on there bucko- the eighth chew has just turned the consistency into something akin to wet cardboard.  Time to swallow.  Phew, didn't need to take a swig of water to get it to go down my throat.

The Verdict:   Pleasantly surprised by the filling (Hostess, you should seriously can it and sell it a la marshmallow whip) but horribly turned off by the cake.  Next time I am in the mood for Hostess, I will definitely be sticking to the chocolate variety.

Totally glad I bit the bullet, but I probably won't be eating more any time soon.  Unless I make something from this cook book:

Awesome.