My life has been a little chaotic as of late. The direct result of working and going to school full time, trying to get back on a fitness plan at the gym, and being a friend, sister, and daughter is complete exhaustion. Exhaustion to the point that I don’t know how I function on some days. You know that feeling you get when you’re driving in the car and five minutes go by and you don’t even remember how your car got to where it was. Kind of like that, memory erasing exhaustion.
The beeping alarm clock at 4:30 in the morning is mostly to blame. In my fantasy world, I would wake up refreshed every morning with a shirtless Edward Norton bringing me coffee and breakfast in bed. You know, the muscular Edward Norton from American History X minus the whole racist thing and inappropriate tattoo on his chest (hey, it’s my dream, don’t judge). But reality hits when the bills come rolling in and I have to be some sort of contributing member to society.
Luckily I have a fantastic job. And while getting up at 4:30 isn’t ideal, it sure is nice to be getting off when others still have hours left in their work day. I also have the pleasure of carpooling with Goth Girl since we only live blocks away from each other. Over the past several weeks we have come to the conclusion that exhaustion has a strange effect on me. Most people are crabby or keep to themselves when they are tired. This hasn’t proven to be true with me. Apparently my exhaustion leads to a state of sheer delusion and I’ve said some pretty crazy things during our morning commute.
Goth Girl has convinced me that not sharing this is some sort of crime against mankind, so I hope you enjoy. Disclaimer: These are out of context, but to be honest I probably can’t even remember how they ever related to a story to begin with (remember the driving story and forgetting things). So here you go. Just keep in mind that FAL is a judge free zone.
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“My apple fell far from the sophistication tree”
“Watch the face, it’s my money maker”
“You know it’s going to be a good weekend when Wet-Naps are involved”
“Good thing there weren’t any cute guys there last night. There’s no alluring way to eat a chicken wing”
Goth Girl: “So would you ever date someone that smoked?”
Me: “I don’t know…My mom smokes and it doesn’t really bother me. But I guess I’ve never kissed her on the mouth.”
“If one day someone walks up to me and says ‘Damn, you’re sexy bitch’ then my life will be complete”
(In a concerned/irritated tone) “He better come over early if he wants to talk. There will be no conversing during Glee”
“Quit drinking out of my optimism glass. That’s not the answer I wanted to hear”
“I guess we get a $100 gift card from work if we have a baby. Maybe I’ll think about popping one out”
Me: “I started my liquid diet last night”
Goth Girl: “Really?!?”
Me: “Yeah, I had wine for dinner”
“I’m not there to make friends, I’m there to get an A in the class”
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This is just a taste of what goes on in my head when I’m extremely tired. Goth Girl and I are thinking of running a tape recorder during our commute. Stayed tuned for more…
Sounds like you and Goth Girl have a good thing going, you know your tied when you start laughing and can't stop and your cheeks hurt & your eyes are crying. Pop Tart & I have those moments and if someone were to see us they would think we were crazy... Good to know there are more people out there doing the same....
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